Perspective Is Important But Feelings Are Feelings.

Feelings are feelings.” That’s what my dear friend, Michael Quinn (pic above left) told me this week. And when Michael talks, I listen.

Michael doesn’t know this yet but he has unwittingly become my life coach and I am so grateful. He is the best sounding board. PLUS, he consistently comes up with creative new ways of coping with all this chaotic, crazy sh*t life keeps throwing at us. Everybody needs a friend like MMQ in their corner.

Here’s what I discovered during this week’s FaceTime with Michael

Although I pride myself on being open to new ideas, it turns out I’m not nearly as resilient and adaptable as I claim.

  • I can be stubborn as a mule and too often insist on doing things my way. But the pandemic doesn’t care what I think or how unhappy and frustrated I’ve become with it.
  • Michael listens calmly and then gently reminds me of all the good things I have in my life.
  • He finally got me to see the upside of many of the restrictions I’m chafing against.
  • For example, while there’s no “Nat Geo Around The World Trip” in my future, he got me to consider how many amazing experiences I’ll surely have on my upcoming cross-country road trip, e.g., the FREEDOM of the road, the interesting people I’ll meet along the way, all the fabulous places I’ll finally get to explore.
  • By the time we got off the phone, I was half-way to a mental re-set and could almost envision how post-lockdown could be transformative and provide a once-in-a-lifetime learning experience.
Later that same night, the re-set got another boost.

I watched Joe Rogan’s podcast with Brian Grazer (from Oct. 2019, link below). Grazer’s perspective on leading a life fueled by curiosity is inspiring at any time but never more so than right now.

However, what resonated most with me was Grazer’s retelling of a random conversation he had with a woman at a party who had endured a horrible, life-threatening experience. The only reason she survived was her ability to escape (mentally) into the alternate reality she had created for herself.

  • That random meeting and fateful conversation about survival, changed how Grazer constructed his award-winning film, A Beautiful Mind.
  • The woman was Veronica de Negri, a Chilean activist, who had been kidnapped and tortured for 8-months.
  • She described surviving that horror by slipping into a parallel universe, her alternate reality, whenever necessary.
  • That insight became the narrative device for A Beautiful Mind, Grazer’s film about schizophrenia.

Obviously, my situation during this pandemic is nothing like hers. But I am inspired to figure out ways to develop better coping mechanisms so I don’t feel so dejected and gloomy about the future.

Scroll down for more on Grazer plus a great short video straight from Brad’s AZ Studio.
Brian Grazer on Joe Rogan

Brian Grazer is a film and television producer and screenwriter. He co-founded Imagine Entertainment in 1986, with Ron Howard. An amazing person, I’ve written about him before.

a few interesting tidbits from the podcast
  • Grazer says he’s in the “feelings business” (versus the movie business) – an important distinction!
  • He makes all his own calls (although he has 3 assistants)
  • He grew up with dyslexia so never knew how to read as a kid and was bullied, made to feel stupid, etc. but it also made him focus on one-on-one interactions. He’s really big on making eye contact with people while talking to them.
  • He’s a curiosity hound. For over 35 years, he’s arranged weekly “curiosity conversations.” The conversations are with people who he’s curious about and feels he can learn from, e.g., experts, politicians, Nobel laureates, scientists, people who have been on intense journeys of discovery. Sometimes it takes over a year to get people to agree to meet with him and then more time to finally arrange a time/city to meet up.
  • There’s a childlike wonder, almost naivete, about him that seems completely genuine and is highly contagious.
  • His friendship circle is extensive and includes a few surprises, e.g., Cardi B who wanted to know all about the value of contemporary art and the role of art dealers like Larry Gagosian.
  • What really knocked my socks off was when it became clear that nobody had given Grazer a thumbs up about Joe Rogan’s pothead ways. He was completely flabbergasted to learn that Joe had weed (and other drugs) sitting right on the table while they were doing the podcast. It’s a pretty hysterical moment.
Brad Kahlhamer at his AZ Studio

Brad has been astoundingly productive this year at his AZ/Mesa studio. Check out this 5-minute video “postcard” from the desert. Link below (make sure SOUND IS UP).

https://drive.google.com/file/d/1Fp7sYC-wuDH3P8dfc9HdZCkmU_4scByc/view?usp=sharing

NEW! Lessons In Post-Lockdown Etiquette

This has become a hot topic. Elbow bumps vs. hugs, how to blow out birthday cake candles, how to safely meet up with friends.

The PSA (below) by Leo Burnett for Thai Health is worth a look-see. Reminiscent of the best anti-smoking campaigns.

And that’s a wrap

As you can tell, I’m struggling with some pretty dramatic emotions these days (as I think many of us are).

I know this too will pass but while we’re in the thick of it, with no end in sight, it’s rough going. At least for me.

It makes me incredibly envious of my more introspective, homebody friends who are loving this slower-paced life and are actually flourishing during the pandemic. (Sigh)

And with that, I’m wishing you all a great weekend! Weather will be hot and steamy in NYC but I am excited to meet up with friends for takeout cocktails on Sunday. And I’m super excited that this coming week, one of my favorite spots, Governor’s Island, is re-opening. There is a light at the end of the tunnel. Can’t wait!

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